Optimize Your Time in Bed

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REM is not just one of the best bands; it’s also the best kind of sleep (I want to apologize for that, it was just too easy to pass up), and I am willing to bet that in a given day, you aren’t putting much thought into making sure you’re getting the best sleep. Don’t get me wrong, I’m sure that you’re thinking of sleep, consistently, but I’m not so sure you’re doing the best you can to ensure the sleep you get is optimal. There are very few things on earth worse than a poor night’s sleep and very few things better than a good night’s sleep. The key is, getting the latter to outnumber the former, by like, a lot. Come and I’ll do my best to help you maximize bed time sleepy time. Trust me, sweetness follows.


The first rule should always be to make sure you’re getting enough sleep - of course, this means different things to different people, so make sure to fit it to match your needs. I hate to go all Mom on you but try to get to bed at a reasonable time. The human body is fantastic at adapting to structure, so even if you’re only getting five hours a night, you’ll feel perfectly rested as long as they’re the same five hours every night.

Turn off your devices

Don’t get confused, being in bed by a certain time is not the same as getting enough sleep. Strangely enough, when a lot of us get into bed, we don’t use the opportunity to maximize our sleep, instead we use it to catch up on [insert popular TV show here]. With the ubiquity of mobile devices, bedtime has evolved to be synonymous with TV time, and not only is that eating away at your sleep, it may actually be bad for you. Kick the habit off screen watching in bed and make the bedroom a “screen free zone”. Not only will your eyes thank you, your mornings will, too.

Keep your phone on silent

Obviously this is only applicable if you’re NOT on call for something over night, but, like Pavlov’s dogs, something in our mind salivates the instant we hear our phones ring/buzz from a text message. It’s so much like crack to us that I’m sure someone (me) has stayed up all night having a conversation over text. Silence those bad boys and get yourself some shut eye.


Remember when I said there was nothing worse than a bad night of sleep? I lied. The one thing worse than that – other than pickle juice in the eye, obviously – is a bad night of sleep caused by a bad bed. Ever wake up with a stiff neck after sleeping on a bed you’re not used to? Exactly. Nip this in the bud and get you a bed you, and your body, can be proud of.

“But it’s so hard to find the right mattress, and they’re so expensive, and they’re so hard to transport…blah blah blah…”

That’s where you’re wrong. Consider this, consider this little company called Casper (no, not this Casper, though, I’m sure they’re plenty friendly).

The beds, or should I say bed, Casper makes is not only an award-winning, commercially-loved product, it’s much cheaper than other memory foam mattresses, it’s vacuum sealed and packaged in an easily maneuverable box (it’s still a mattress and super heavy) AND it’s delivered to straight to your door! I know, it’s bonkers.

But wait! There’s more!

Remember those tiny little dinosaur sponges you would get as a kid? The ones where adding water would make them “grow”? Well, unpacking your Casper bed is the adulting version of that, and it’s AWESOME! Honestly, you should probably just buy the bed for that reason alone.

Grabbing yourself a good night’s sleep isn’t easy, but it’s worth it. Get yourself a comfy bed, and stay disciplined with your sleep schedule and you’ll see the world in a whole new light.

Until next time – sleep well and remember, that was just a dream.

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When Arye isn't helping optimize your time, he is doing his part to ensure life is full of shenanigans.